Well, I ran the first two of my WSOP sub-satellites this past weekend. Haven't been that unlucky in a long while. Pocket kings busted by a set of 7's. AK busted by a set of 7's on an Ace high board. Got my own set of Jacks, lost with them. Twice. In some ways it was amazing that I was able to last as long as I did either day, but in the end, I just couldn't get lucky at all. Skill was on my side, especially Sunday, when I knew right where I was every time. Unfortunately, the luck part of the equation didn't come through at all. C'est la vie, no WSOP for me this year. On the bright side, of the four seats that I awarded this weekend, two of them went to students of mine, who both played very well.
The one bright note for poker would be that I did cash at "The Rob" for the 9th straight week. Really quite amazing. But I'd gladly give them all up for a seat in the $1K, and a couple of cashes at AIPCO instead.
Lots of other news this week that struck me as interesting....
Ever heard of Robert Harrison? Google the name, with "Icarus" project, and check it out. Dude is pretty amazing. He takes weather balloons, and duct tapes on a used Canon camera that he bought off of ebay. He reprogrammed the camera to wake up every 5 minutes, take 8 photos and a video, and then shut off for a rest. The pictures are amazing. NASA said that it would take them about $450 million to do what this guy has done. His total cost: $750. Um, I'm thinking this is someone that should be in charge of something, rather than doing this as a hobby.
Speaking of space, saw a story this week that there are a few billion more stars out there than we had thought. Um, I'm thinking it's a whole lot more than that. Hubble doesn't even scratch the surface of what all is out there, folks. That whole Carl Sagan "billions and billions" of stars that so many people made fun of... looking pretty solid now.
Bill Maher was fantastic this week. Bill: "Remember a couple of months ago, when Sarah Palin came out asking 'How's that whole hopey-changey thing working out for you?' 'Great. How's that whole hooked-on-phonics thing working out for you?'"
He also brought up the quote from John McCain this past week, and how much his partisanship has diverged from the guy who gave such a classy concession speech 16 months ago. In that speech, McCain came across as a person who really did put "country first" and wanted to work at joining together both sides of the aisle. Compare that to the person who this week came out with the "No co-operation the rest of the year" speech. Is this the same guy?
Science story this week about the world's phosphorous reserves hitting their peak in the next couple of decades. I'm sure most of you could care less about that, but you should. No phosphorous means no fertilizer. No fertilizer means agricultural crops drop 15-25% annually. 30 years from now, the world population will have grown by a couple of billion people. With less food. Do the math.
In other "feel good about the future" news, Social Security was in the red for the first time this year. Yes, folks, that tipping point has been reached, and we'll now be losing money until it runs out. Good thing I've got such a solid job that I don't have to worry about th... Oh, wait a minute....
Speaking of... Now looking like I won't be getting the TSA gig. At least not for a while. I'm finally in the system, but they stopped looking to hire anyone right about the time I started this process. I can stay in the system for two years, and hopefully something will come along before I run out of unemployment.
Remember last week, when I was talking about how I hoped that the good weather wouldn't end just in time to rain out my first 10 games? Well, game one was tonight, and it was rained out. Game two is Wednesday, and not looking so good. Game three is Thursday, also not looking good. Hmmm, wish I had been wrong.
On the bright side, my pitchers are starting to look GOOOOOOOOOOD. Like, unhittable good. I now have four that I have no problem throwing out there, and feeling pretty confident with. And a fifth who will be fine once he gets a little more practice. He was out for a week with illness, and then went on vacation for spring break, so he lost two weeks of work. But my top couple of kids, I don't think there's more than 5 or 6 kids in the whole league who will be able to hit them.
So, tell me, someone who knows movies better than me, how did Midnight Cowboy win best picture, and Dustin Hoffman not win best actor? I thought the movie pretty much sucked, but the one thing that kept me watching it, the ONLY really redeeming quality in my eyes, was Hoffman's portrayal of Ratzo Rizzo. Honestly, the reason he didn't win is because he really should have been nominated as supporting actor, which would have made him a slam dunk. But the movie beat out Butch Cassidey and the Sundance Kid, which amazes me. This was the first of my "classic" movies that I've been renting from Netflix that I was really disappointed in.
Finally caught up on the new series Justified. Think this one is going to be a winner.
Not much else new or wonderful going on with me. Wish me luck in poker, as I go for 10 in a row at "The Rob" tomorrow night.
Thank you all for making my life a better place.
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Friday, March 26, 2010
Taking the road less traveled
So, as I've mentioned in the past couple of weeks, I'm a big fan of the TV show Breaking Bad. For those of you unfamiliar with it, I'll give a brief synopsis. It tells the story of a high school chemistry teacher, Walter White, who is dying of cancer. His health insurance won't cover the costs of his treatment, and his wife is pregnant with a child they hadn't planned on. His son has MS. So basically he's about to die, and leave his family with a pile of debt that they have no hope of paying off. So he ends up manufacturing crystal meth, and because of his chemistry background, he's able to make the purest form ever seen. He ends up partnering with one of his former students, and eventually becomes a major player in the drug trade in the southwest US.
It's a fabulous show, for so many reasons. Bryan Cranston plays Walter White. Most of you would know him as the dad in Malcolm in the Middle. And if that's the only thing you know him from, you'll be amazed at just how good of a dramatic actor he is. Aaron Paul plays his partner, and also does a great job. But the real star of the show is the writing. They constantly put these characters into situations that the show's creator calls the "watercooler" moments, in reference to the old practice of people standing around the watercooler discussing interesting shows the following day. His goal is to create these situations that are 100% grey, no black, no white.
The whole concept of the show is a grey area, really. What would you do for the people that you love? To what lengths would you sacrifice your own health, sanity, freedom, morality, even your soul if you so choose to believe in one? What would you give up in order to secure the future of the people that you love? I think that in the beginning, most of us would be willing to do almost anything, especially if we knew that we were going to die soon. I know that I would. I, of course, have the added benefit of not believing in God, and therefore don't worry much about Judgement Day. I try to live a life that is fairly moral and good, but it is because I choose to be that way, not because I'm afraid there might be consequences if I don't. So if I were going to be dead soon, I would do what I had to do to make things as easy as possible for the ones I love. Not everyone would go that route, but I think that most of us would have that as our first instinct.
The problems that follow afterwards though are the ones that are interesting to me. As the show progresses over the course of now 3 seasons, Walter finds that he likes the power and control over his life that being the bad guy allows him to have. He keeps trying to look at himself as a good person, who is only doing this for his family. But the further he goes down that road, the less it is about that, and the more it is about the allure of the darker path. There's a great scene in season 2 where he's in a hardware store, and he spots a guy with all the things to cook meth. He goes over to the guy and tells him all the things he's doing wrong. Then he is in the parking lot, and spots the guy with his partner. He goes over and tells them to stay the hell out of his territory. You can see the pleasure that he gets out of exerting that power. Six months before, he was nothing but a chemistry teacher, and now he's this person of almost mythic proportions. And he can't get enough of it.
I could go on and on about the show. Netflix it, rent it, whatever you have to do, but watch it. It's that good.
However, I don't want to make this blog ENTIRELY about the show. Rather, I just want to talk about the nature of good and evil a bit. The two scenes that have popped into my head are the Empire Strikes Back "You don't know the POWER of the Dark Side", and the scene in the bar in Se7en, where Morgan Freeman is telling Brad Pitt "Of course it's easier to steal what you need, rather than to earn it..." Evil is easier, because you have less to answer for. Being good requires a lot more work. This is true on all levels, not just the grandiose. It's easier to sit on the couch eating Ben and Jerry's than it is to eat a salad and go to the gym. It's easier to let things pile up on your desk than it is to actually pay bills, file the paperwork, and keep on top of things. It's definitely easier to ignore the people in your life who need time, effort, help, love, compassion, until such time as YOU need those things, or have something else to gain by devoting time to them.
I see the tendrils of this topic spreading into so many different areas. It is almost overwhelming to think about when you step back and look at the bigger picture here. It touches on the overly litigious nature of our society in the past 30-40 years. It certainly impacts the fact that our apathy in general, and especially in the educational system, have crippled us on an international scale. It explains how we have allowed ourselves to become so depressed as a societal whole that we take more Prozac, Paxil and Xanax in this country in a month than the rest of the world combined takes in a year. Even the US Army, the last bastion of truth, justice and the American way, this week came out with changes to their boot camp training, adjusting for "softer" kids, raised on video games.
Too many of us choose the easy path now. Too many people refuse to put forth the effort for something more. It scares me, not because I think it affects me, but because I don't see it changing in my lifetime. I don't know how it will. We reached the tipping point somewhere in the last 20 years, and I don't think we can ever get it back. For me personally, it's actually a good thing. I'm smarter and work harder than the average person, so I will be more in demand in this new world order. Furthermore, I don't have kids, so I don't have to worry about the declining state of affairs that my children will have to contend with.
I do, however, care about my world. I care about the future for my nieces and nephew, and for the children of my friends. I care about society in general. As I've said before, for the most part, I'm a socialist, in the truest sense of the word. I care about society as a whole, and want to see it bettered for all.
I remember a saying I used to have when I tried to describe what went wrong in one of my previous relationships. I said that I spent the past year digging in the dirt, filling sandbags to keep the dam from breaking, only to look up at the end of that time and see that I was the only one with a shovel. Sometimes I feel that way about things now. Obviously I'm not the only one with a shovel in the world. But I do feel outnumbered. I do feel as though there are far more people sitting back in their Barcaloungers with a bag of Funyuns, waiting for the show that TV guide promises will be the best representation of the Apocalypse yet.
I will not give up the fight, though. I will continue to bring joy and happiness to those around me. I will continue to work hard, play hard, live hard. As is printed on one of my favorite T-shirts: "I will not tiptoe through life, only to arrive safely at death".
We all have a choice, every day. It's always the same, every day. We can choose to do good, to live well, to help those around us. Or we can choose the easy path, that well worn road of apathy, indifference, and callousness.
As Robert Frost put it best:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
May we all take that less traveled path. May we all work towards the common good, and the common health and well-being of our peers.
It's a fabulous show, for so many reasons. Bryan Cranston plays Walter White. Most of you would know him as the dad in Malcolm in the Middle. And if that's the only thing you know him from, you'll be amazed at just how good of a dramatic actor he is. Aaron Paul plays his partner, and also does a great job. But the real star of the show is the writing. They constantly put these characters into situations that the show's creator calls the "watercooler" moments, in reference to the old practice of people standing around the watercooler discussing interesting shows the following day. His goal is to create these situations that are 100% grey, no black, no white.
The whole concept of the show is a grey area, really. What would you do for the people that you love? To what lengths would you sacrifice your own health, sanity, freedom, morality, even your soul if you so choose to believe in one? What would you give up in order to secure the future of the people that you love? I think that in the beginning, most of us would be willing to do almost anything, especially if we knew that we were going to die soon. I know that I would. I, of course, have the added benefit of not believing in God, and therefore don't worry much about Judgement Day. I try to live a life that is fairly moral and good, but it is because I choose to be that way, not because I'm afraid there might be consequences if I don't. So if I were going to be dead soon, I would do what I had to do to make things as easy as possible for the ones I love. Not everyone would go that route, but I think that most of us would have that as our first instinct.
The problems that follow afterwards though are the ones that are interesting to me. As the show progresses over the course of now 3 seasons, Walter finds that he likes the power and control over his life that being the bad guy allows him to have. He keeps trying to look at himself as a good person, who is only doing this for his family. But the further he goes down that road, the less it is about that, and the more it is about the allure of the darker path. There's a great scene in season 2 where he's in a hardware store, and he spots a guy with all the things to cook meth. He goes over to the guy and tells him all the things he's doing wrong. Then he is in the parking lot, and spots the guy with his partner. He goes over and tells them to stay the hell out of his territory. You can see the pleasure that he gets out of exerting that power. Six months before, he was nothing but a chemistry teacher, and now he's this person of almost mythic proportions. And he can't get enough of it.
I could go on and on about the show. Netflix it, rent it, whatever you have to do, but watch it. It's that good.
However, I don't want to make this blog ENTIRELY about the show. Rather, I just want to talk about the nature of good and evil a bit. The two scenes that have popped into my head are the Empire Strikes Back "You don't know the POWER of the Dark Side", and the scene in the bar in Se7en, where Morgan Freeman is telling Brad Pitt "Of course it's easier to steal what you need, rather than to earn it..." Evil is easier, because you have less to answer for. Being good requires a lot more work. This is true on all levels, not just the grandiose. It's easier to sit on the couch eating Ben and Jerry's than it is to eat a salad and go to the gym. It's easier to let things pile up on your desk than it is to actually pay bills, file the paperwork, and keep on top of things. It's definitely easier to ignore the people in your life who need time, effort, help, love, compassion, until such time as YOU need those things, or have something else to gain by devoting time to them.
I see the tendrils of this topic spreading into so many different areas. It is almost overwhelming to think about when you step back and look at the bigger picture here. It touches on the overly litigious nature of our society in the past 30-40 years. It certainly impacts the fact that our apathy in general, and especially in the educational system, have crippled us on an international scale. It explains how we have allowed ourselves to become so depressed as a societal whole that we take more Prozac, Paxil and Xanax in this country in a month than the rest of the world combined takes in a year. Even the US Army, the last bastion of truth, justice and the American way, this week came out with changes to their boot camp training, adjusting for "softer" kids, raised on video games.
Too many of us choose the easy path now. Too many people refuse to put forth the effort for something more. It scares me, not because I think it affects me, but because I don't see it changing in my lifetime. I don't know how it will. We reached the tipping point somewhere in the last 20 years, and I don't think we can ever get it back. For me personally, it's actually a good thing. I'm smarter and work harder than the average person, so I will be more in demand in this new world order. Furthermore, I don't have kids, so I don't have to worry about the declining state of affairs that my children will have to contend with.
I do, however, care about my world. I care about the future for my nieces and nephew, and for the children of my friends. I care about society in general. As I've said before, for the most part, I'm a socialist, in the truest sense of the word. I care about society as a whole, and want to see it bettered for all.
I remember a saying I used to have when I tried to describe what went wrong in one of my previous relationships. I said that I spent the past year digging in the dirt, filling sandbags to keep the dam from breaking, only to look up at the end of that time and see that I was the only one with a shovel. Sometimes I feel that way about things now. Obviously I'm not the only one with a shovel in the world. But I do feel outnumbered. I do feel as though there are far more people sitting back in their Barcaloungers with a bag of Funyuns, waiting for the show that TV guide promises will be the best representation of the Apocalypse yet.
I will not give up the fight, though. I will continue to bring joy and happiness to those around me. I will continue to work hard, play hard, live hard. As is printed on one of my favorite T-shirts: "I will not tiptoe through life, only to arrive safely at death".
We all have a choice, every day. It's always the same, every day. We can choose to do good, to live well, to help those around us. Or we can choose the easy path, that well worn road of apathy, indifference, and callousness.
As Robert Frost put it best:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
May we all take that less traveled path. May we all work towards the common good, and the common health and well-being of our peers.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
T-Minus one week...
It's amazing to me that my weeks seem to blow by so fast, even with me not working. I feel like I've got a gazillion things going on every week, and yet, don't have a job. Wonder how overwhelmed I'd be feeling right about now if I DID have a job.
One week until our first game in baseball, and I'm now officially worried about the season. I have a handful of kids who absolutely will not get touched if they can throw strikes. Two kids who throw so hard that only the best hitters on each team even have a shot, and two kids who throw balls with so much movement on them that it looks like watching old footage of Greg Maddux. Unfortunately, because no one is going to be hitting them, they'll be forced to throw at least three strikes to each batter, and that seems like it is going to be an issue. I've never coached a pitching staff that was this wild, and I have a feeling we're in for a long season. NOTHING in baseball is worse than watching batter after batter draw a walk. Ugh.
Mixed bag in poker last week. Cashed for the 8th week in a row at my house, but then completely bombed at AIPCO. Couldn't get anything going there all night, and was rarely over my starting stack. Also a mixed bag at the final table. Only two of my Tuesday night crew made the final table, but we did end up with those two taking 1st and 3rd. Still, overall it was a rather weak showing for myself and my crew.
Saw an interesting story on "hyper awareness", and want to look into it. It is something that can be trained, and I think it would help my poker game immensely.
Had a great time at a Persian New Year/Spring Equinox party this weekend. I made a bunch of Persian themed cheesecakes for it, and some of them turned out really well. I think the almond cheesecake that I made is the best cheesecake I've ever made. Four different almond forms in it. Fresh almonds, almond paste, almond extract and Amaretto. Was very, very yummy. Also did a rosewater one that was knock your socks off good. The other 6 were good, not spectacular.
Breaking Bad season three started this past weekend. If you haven't been watching it, you should be. I'll be blogging later this week about a topic that I got from the show, but it is really just amazing writing. And Bryan Cranston can portray the widest range of emotion in one scene that I've ever seen from anyone. The "holy crap" moment near the end of season two is probably the only scene in history to win someone an Emmy when he said almost no dialogue.
Have the first of our sub-satellites to our WSOP tournament coming up this weekend. I'm hoping to win, and then sell my seat, which would give me a nice chunk of money. I would love to play in our $1K tourney again, but I don't see much of a point, since I probably couldn't go down to Vegas for the WSOP this year anyway.
Well, assuming that the TSA ever gets off their ass and moves me on to the next step in the process. Damn, even after clearing up the computer snafu on their end last week, still no movement. I'll put in another call to my mom's friend to hopefully kick someone in the ass yet AGAIN. Ah, don't you just love government bureaucracy.
Speaking of which, yes, I'm very glad that healthcare reform passed. I'm with Dennis Kucinich on this one, it doesn't go NEARLY far enough, but at least it is a start. I also heard a great line as a rebuttal to the people that are outraged, OUTRAGED at this SOCIALIZED health care: We already have socialized police, fire and education, and no one is complaining about that. So then one of my particularly dim acquaintances comes back with "Yeah, but those are UNIVERSAL services, available to everyone, and this health care won't be." Yes, I know folks. These people not only vote, but they breed. Suffice it to say that I tried to point out the fact that you can't bitch about universal health care being socialist policy, and then when confronted with other socialized government programs, defend them as being universal. It was, unfortunately rather like trying to convince my old college neighbor that you couldn't solve the financial crisis by printing more money. No matter how much you tried to explain inflation and devaluation to her, she just kept saying "But they COULD!" Stupid is as stupid does, Forrest.
I am one of the 40% of the country who quit caring about March Madness as soon as Faroukistanisdaynidad made his 83rd three pointer of the game against Kansas. Geez, guys, he's the only person on the team that knows how to shoot, do you think maybe you want to cover him? It's not like he's Steve Kerr, he doesn't have Jordan kicking it out to him. Oh well, good job, Northern Iowa, you just sank the bracket of almost half the country. Bitter, table for one...
I really hope we're not getting all this good weather right up until baseball season starts, and then have our first 10 games rained out.
Okay, I think that's about all of my news for the week. Wish me luck for tomorrow night when I go for 9 cashes in a row here.
Thank you all for being a part of my life.
One week until our first game in baseball, and I'm now officially worried about the season. I have a handful of kids who absolutely will not get touched if they can throw strikes. Two kids who throw so hard that only the best hitters on each team even have a shot, and two kids who throw balls with so much movement on them that it looks like watching old footage of Greg Maddux. Unfortunately, because no one is going to be hitting them, they'll be forced to throw at least three strikes to each batter, and that seems like it is going to be an issue. I've never coached a pitching staff that was this wild, and I have a feeling we're in for a long season. NOTHING in baseball is worse than watching batter after batter draw a walk. Ugh.
Mixed bag in poker last week. Cashed for the 8th week in a row at my house, but then completely bombed at AIPCO. Couldn't get anything going there all night, and was rarely over my starting stack. Also a mixed bag at the final table. Only two of my Tuesday night crew made the final table, but we did end up with those two taking 1st and 3rd. Still, overall it was a rather weak showing for myself and my crew.
Saw an interesting story on "hyper awareness", and want to look into it. It is something that can be trained, and I think it would help my poker game immensely.
Had a great time at a Persian New Year/Spring Equinox party this weekend. I made a bunch of Persian themed cheesecakes for it, and some of them turned out really well. I think the almond cheesecake that I made is the best cheesecake I've ever made. Four different almond forms in it. Fresh almonds, almond paste, almond extract and Amaretto. Was very, very yummy. Also did a rosewater one that was knock your socks off good. The other 6 were good, not spectacular.
Breaking Bad season three started this past weekend. If you haven't been watching it, you should be. I'll be blogging later this week about a topic that I got from the show, but it is really just amazing writing. And Bryan Cranston can portray the widest range of emotion in one scene that I've ever seen from anyone. The "holy crap" moment near the end of season two is probably the only scene in history to win someone an Emmy when he said almost no dialogue.
Have the first of our sub-satellites to our WSOP tournament coming up this weekend. I'm hoping to win, and then sell my seat, which would give me a nice chunk of money. I would love to play in our $1K tourney again, but I don't see much of a point, since I probably couldn't go down to Vegas for the WSOP this year anyway.
Well, assuming that the TSA ever gets off their ass and moves me on to the next step in the process. Damn, even after clearing up the computer snafu on their end last week, still no movement. I'll put in another call to my mom's friend to hopefully kick someone in the ass yet AGAIN. Ah, don't you just love government bureaucracy.
Speaking of which, yes, I'm very glad that healthcare reform passed. I'm with Dennis Kucinich on this one, it doesn't go NEARLY far enough, but at least it is a start. I also heard a great line as a rebuttal to the people that are outraged, OUTRAGED at this SOCIALIZED health care: We already have socialized police, fire and education, and no one is complaining about that. So then one of my particularly dim acquaintances comes back with "Yeah, but those are UNIVERSAL services, available to everyone, and this health care won't be." Yes, I know folks. These people not only vote, but they breed. Suffice it to say that I tried to point out the fact that you can't bitch about universal health care being socialist policy, and then when confronted with other socialized government programs, defend them as being universal. It was, unfortunately rather like trying to convince my old college neighbor that you couldn't solve the financial crisis by printing more money. No matter how much you tried to explain inflation and devaluation to her, she just kept saying "But they COULD!" Stupid is as stupid does, Forrest.
I am one of the 40% of the country who quit caring about March Madness as soon as Faroukistanisdaynidad made his 83rd three pointer of the game against Kansas. Geez, guys, he's the only person on the team that knows how to shoot, do you think maybe you want to cover him? It's not like he's Steve Kerr, he doesn't have Jordan kicking it out to him. Oh well, good job, Northern Iowa, you just sank the bracket of almost half the country. Bitter, table for one...
I really hope we're not getting all this good weather right up until baseball season starts, and then have our first 10 games rained out.
Okay, I think that's about all of my news for the week. Wish me luck for tomorrow night when I go for 9 cashes in a row here.
Thank you all for being a part of my life.
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Overcoming Schadenfreude
When I was younger, I was not a good person. I know that most of you who know me would say that I have always been a good guy, but in reality, I wasn’t. I always seemed to take joy in the misfortune of others. The Germans call it Schadenfreude, and it was something that I experienced all too often. I do think that I am a pretty good guy, and even then, I tried to do what was best for my family and friends. But for many years, there was that little tickle that gave me a smile inside when someone else failed. This is not easy for me to admit, especially in an open forum like this. It is, however, necessary for my continued growth. Once again, just do it.
Over the past few years, I have truly tried to become a better person. I thank Virginia and Terry for that. They are just about the most decent human beings I have ever known, and they taught me that it truly is okay to rejoice in the success and accomplishments of others. It is, however, a hard habit to break. Even after all this time, I struggle with it. I write it off as Karma, or try to justify it in some other way.
The truth is, Schadenfreude is truly the result of our own low self-esteem. When we see someone who is better looking, smarter, funnier, etc., than we are, it makes us feel better about ourselves if we see them fail. It is natural, but not right. There are numerous studies showing the social comparison theory behind Schadenfreude. When other people fail, we look better to ourselves.
I have, for the most part, overcome this for the positive people in my life. Anyone who I consider a friend, I take joy in their success without reveling in the failures of the others involved. Poker has helped with this immensely. I also find it easy to overcome when dealing with strangers, or people that I have had little to no interaction with. Where I find it difficult is in overcoming Schadenfreude when it comes to the people in my life who have wronged me. Or in the rare cases of people who I don’t like, or who don’t like me. This is where I struggle, but I do see hope at least, because I see the conflict within myself.
Obviously, those of you reading this know my history over the past year, and what I went through with Becca. I got news the other night that she hadn’t just put on 70 pounds, but more like 100+ pounds, in only six months since leaving me for another guy. I must admit that in the moment, all I wanted was for her to suffer. I took a perverse amount of pleasure in knowing that she was miserable. But this is not the person that I want to be. I slept extremely poorly that night, and I realized after waking, that the reason I slept so poorly was the conflict in my head over this news.
I have written before, on many occasions, that I want what is best for Becca. I truly do. I don’t think she’s happy right now, and I hope that she somehow finds that. I do believe that everyone deserves happiness; a deep abiding happiness to last throughout our lives. I don’t want to become a vengeance-based personality. That is what happens when you apply Schadenfreude to those who have wronged you. You become vengeance, you embrace the negative, and that fills you up.
I want to embrace the positive. I want to be empathy, not vengeance. There are entire cultures that are based upon the eye-for-an-eye mentality. They treat vengeance as honor, and anything less as dishonor. I don’t begrudge them that, but I don’t want to live that way. I want to be like Gandhi, not Tony Soprano. It is a far more difficult path to endure, but a much easier one to live with. There is no recognition for this, no glory or praise. It is simply knowing within yourself that you have done the right thing.
This becomes harder all the time. Not just for me, but for the world as a whole. Because life is harder right now than it has been in the past. The middle class, the core of the “decent, hard-working [insert Nationality here]”, is disappearing now. The more people in the world that are struggling, the more poor, the more disenfranchised people that we have in the world, the more people we will have feeling bad about themselves. And the more people feel bad about themselves, the more that they are going to be smiling at the misfortune of others.
I will close with one of my favorite quotes. Actually more like a small story. You see it on inspirational posters, and such, and it has always touched me:
A small boy lived by the ocean. He loved the creatures of the sea, especially the starfish, and spent much of his time exploring the seashore. One day he learned there would be a minus tide that would leave the starfish stranded on the sand. The day of the tide he went down to the beach and began picking up stranded starfish and tossing them back into the sea. An elderly man who lived next door came down to the beach to see what he was doing. "I'm saving the starfish," the boy proudly declared. When the neighbor saw all of the stranded starfish, he shook his head and said "I'm sorry to disappoint you, young man, but if you look down the beach one way, there are stranded starfish as far as the eye can see. And if you look down the beach the other way, it's the same. One little boy like you isn't going to make much of a difference." The boy thought about this for a moment. Then he reached his small hand down to the sand, picked up a starfish, tossed it out into the ocean and said, "I sure make a difference for that one."
I know that so many things that I blog about seem as though they are these idealistic notions of how the world should be. That I want to find Thomas More’s Utopia and move us all there. I don’t believe in fantasy, nor do I think that one man can change very much in the world. But I do believe that every man or woman can change much in their world.
Every one of you makes my world a better place. Thank you for that. I will continue to try and return the favor.
Over the past few years, I have truly tried to become a better person. I thank Virginia and Terry for that. They are just about the most decent human beings I have ever known, and they taught me that it truly is okay to rejoice in the success and accomplishments of others. It is, however, a hard habit to break. Even after all this time, I struggle with it. I write it off as Karma, or try to justify it in some other way.
The truth is, Schadenfreude is truly the result of our own low self-esteem. When we see someone who is better looking, smarter, funnier, etc., than we are, it makes us feel better about ourselves if we see them fail. It is natural, but not right. There are numerous studies showing the social comparison theory behind Schadenfreude. When other people fail, we look better to ourselves.
I have, for the most part, overcome this for the positive people in my life. Anyone who I consider a friend, I take joy in their success without reveling in the failures of the others involved. Poker has helped with this immensely. I also find it easy to overcome when dealing with strangers, or people that I have had little to no interaction with. Where I find it difficult is in overcoming Schadenfreude when it comes to the people in my life who have wronged me. Or in the rare cases of people who I don’t like, or who don’t like me. This is where I struggle, but I do see hope at least, because I see the conflict within myself.
Obviously, those of you reading this know my history over the past year, and what I went through with Becca. I got news the other night that she hadn’t just put on 70 pounds, but more like 100+ pounds, in only six months since leaving me for another guy. I must admit that in the moment, all I wanted was for her to suffer. I took a perverse amount of pleasure in knowing that she was miserable. But this is not the person that I want to be. I slept extremely poorly that night, and I realized after waking, that the reason I slept so poorly was the conflict in my head over this news.
I have written before, on many occasions, that I want what is best for Becca. I truly do. I don’t think she’s happy right now, and I hope that she somehow finds that. I do believe that everyone deserves happiness; a deep abiding happiness to last throughout our lives. I don’t want to become a vengeance-based personality. That is what happens when you apply Schadenfreude to those who have wronged you. You become vengeance, you embrace the negative, and that fills you up.
I want to embrace the positive. I want to be empathy, not vengeance. There are entire cultures that are based upon the eye-for-an-eye mentality. They treat vengeance as honor, and anything less as dishonor. I don’t begrudge them that, but I don’t want to live that way. I want to be like Gandhi, not Tony Soprano. It is a far more difficult path to endure, but a much easier one to live with. There is no recognition for this, no glory or praise. It is simply knowing within yourself that you have done the right thing.
This becomes harder all the time. Not just for me, but for the world as a whole. Because life is harder right now than it has been in the past. The middle class, the core of the “decent, hard-working [insert Nationality here]”, is disappearing now. The more people in the world that are struggling, the more poor, the more disenfranchised people that we have in the world, the more people we will have feeling bad about themselves. And the more people feel bad about themselves, the more that they are going to be smiling at the misfortune of others.
I will close with one of my favorite quotes. Actually more like a small story. You see it on inspirational posters, and such, and it has always touched me:
A small boy lived by the ocean. He loved the creatures of the sea, especially the starfish, and spent much of his time exploring the seashore. One day he learned there would be a minus tide that would leave the starfish stranded on the sand. The day of the tide he went down to the beach and began picking up stranded starfish and tossing them back into the sea. An elderly man who lived next door came down to the beach to see what he was doing. "I'm saving the starfish," the boy proudly declared. When the neighbor saw all of the stranded starfish, he shook his head and said "I'm sorry to disappoint you, young man, but if you look down the beach one way, there are stranded starfish as far as the eye can see. And if you look down the beach the other way, it's the same. One little boy like you isn't going to make much of a difference." The boy thought about this for a moment. Then he reached his small hand down to the sand, picked up a starfish, tossed it out into the ocean and said, "I sure make a difference for that one."
I know that so many things that I blog about seem as though they are these idealistic notions of how the world should be. That I want to find Thomas More’s Utopia and move us all there. I don’t believe in fantasy, nor do I think that one man can change very much in the world. But I do believe that every man or woman can change much in their world.
Every one of you makes my world a better place. Thank you for that. I will continue to try and return the favor.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
A Week Without Sunshine is Like... Night.
Well, once again, I’m a day late on my weekly recap. I was just feeling uber-lazy over the weekend, and didn’t get around to writing. This was the last weekend until June that I don’t have either poker or baseball as a commitment. So I did pretty much nothing all weekend. Watched TV, played on the internet, sat in the hot tub, blew bubbles, anything at all that would qualify as lazy-day fun, I did it. Because now I don’t get another one of those days for a few months. Hopefully it won’t put too much of a crimp in my blogging, which I have come to enjoy. Especially now that I’ve opened it up somewhat to friends and family. Hello readers. Hopefully you’re not bored of me yet.
Baseball is slowly, frustratingly, achingly, coming along at a snail’s pace. Pitchers are starting to look fairly good, and I think we will throw enough strikes to actually get things in play. Unfortunately, our defense is so bad that it’s a coin flip on whether or not they will field a grounder, and another coin flip as to whether or not they’ll actually make the throw. For those of you bad at math, that means that only about 1 in 4 ground balls will turn into outs. And for those of you bad at baseball math, that means we’re going to lose a LOT more than we will win. Well, either that, or we’ll have to score enough runs to win 9-8 games. It reminds me of the scouting report years ago for my childhood friend Gabe Alvarez, who went on to be the starting third baseman for the Detroit Tigers for a couple of years. “Alvarez can still hit the leather off of the ball, but it’s the giant gaping hole in his glove that has the team concerned.” Yup, that’s our team in a nutshell.
Made cheesecakes for poker last week. Three new flavors. Mandarin Orange was fucking amazing. Did a Tart Cherry that will be better the next time I make it. Not quite cherry enough. Also did a Raspberry one for a birthday gift. Looked awesome, batter tasted awesome, and the review from the birthday girl was great. Will have to make one for myself soon, just to try it out. Might be going to a Persian New Year celebration this Saturday if I’m not completely wiped out from AIPCO Friday night. If I do, I’m doing a whole assortment of Persian themed cheesecakes for that.
AIPCO will hopefully go better for me this month than it did last month. I’m frustrated with my play right now, despite running my cash streak up to 7 weeks in a row at “The Rob”. Been very volatile online, and am just not playing my best. Especially at Absolute, where the play is so bad that I should be crushing it. But I think it is dragging my play down along with it. I’m like the Roberto Duran of poker, I play to the level of my opponents, and it is irking me a bit. I am capable of much, much more, and I need to get myself focused and hungry again. Too many lazy plays.
Have been lazy in my workout regimen lately as well. Baseball always has that effect, as I feel wiped out from that too many days. No excuses though, and will get back to a regular pace this week. Just do it.
Yes, being the giant fan-boy that I am, I had to Netflix the original Tron and watch it again. Still love it, even though the effects are pretty bad to look at now.
Finally found out that it has been yet another computer glitch that has been keeping me from getting further in the process in the TSA gig. I had accepted the conditional offer of employment, and my dashboard in their system showed that I had accepted it. However, on their end, it didn’t show me as having accepted. So now I’m in their system, and hopefully will start moving through the process again soon.
Breaking Bad comes back on next Sunday for those of you interested. Great show. Netflix the first two seasons if you haven’t watched it. One of the top 2 or 3 shows on TV right now. Bryan Cranston should win the Emmy every year. Hugh Laurie, Jon Hamm, and Michael C. Hall are great, but not even on the same level.
Have realized that I need to start carrying around a pad and paper, so that I can remember all the things that I want to put in my weekly stuff. Just little random notes about my week.
Nothing else Earth-shattering that I can think of for now. Hope to get a regular blog or two done this week for you.
I love you all. Thank you for enriching my life with your presence.
Baseball is slowly, frustratingly, achingly, coming along at a snail’s pace. Pitchers are starting to look fairly good, and I think we will throw enough strikes to actually get things in play. Unfortunately, our defense is so bad that it’s a coin flip on whether or not they will field a grounder, and another coin flip as to whether or not they’ll actually make the throw. For those of you bad at math, that means that only about 1 in 4 ground balls will turn into outs. And for those of you bad at baseball math, that means we’re going to lose a LOT more than we will win. Well, either that, or we’ll have to score enough runs to win 9-8 games. It reminds me of the scouting report years ago for my childhood friend Gabe Alvarez, who went on to be the starting third baseman for the Detroit Tigers for a couple of years. “Alvarez can still hit the leather off of the ball, but it’s the giant gaping hole in his glove that has the team concerned.” Yup, that’s our team in a nutshell.
Made cheesecakes for poker last week. Three new flavors. Mandarin Orange was fucking amazing. Did a Tart Cherry that will be better the next time I make it. Not quite cherry enough. Also did a Raspberry one for a birthday gift. Looked awesome, batter tasted awesome, and the review from the birthday girl was great. Will have to make one for myself soon, just to try it out. Might be going to a Persian New Year celebration this Saturday if I’m not completely wiped out from AIPCO Friday night. If I do, I’m doing a whole assortment of Persian themed cheesecakes for that.
AIPCO will hopefully go better for me this month than it did last month. I’m frustrated with my play right now, despite running my cash streak up to 7 weeks in a row at “The Rob”. Been very volatile online, and am just not playing my best. Especially at Absolute, where the play is so bad that I should be crushing it. But I think it is dragging my play down along with it. I’m like the Roberto Duran of poker, I play to the level of my opponents, and it is irking me a bit. I am capable of much, much more, and I need to get myself focused and hungry again. Too many lazy plays.
Have been lazy in my workout regimen lately as well. Baseball always has that effect, as I feel wiped out from that too many days. No excuses though, and will get back to a regular pace this week. Just do it.
Yes, being the giant fan-boy that I am, I had to Netflix the original Tron and watch it again. Still love it, even though the effects are pretty bad to look at now.
Finally found out that it has been yet another computer glitch that has been keeping me from getting further in the process in the TSA gig. I had accepted the conditional offer of employment, and my dashboard in their system showed that I had accepted it. However, on their end, it didn’t show me as having accepted. So now I’m in their system, and hopefully will start moving through the process again soon.
Breaking Bad comes back on next Sunday for those of you interested. Great show. Netflix the first two seasons if you haven’t watched it. One of the top 2 or 3 shows on TV right now. Bryan Cranston should win the Emmy every year. Hugh Laurie, Jon Hamm, and Michael C. Hall are great, but not even on the same level.
Have realized that I need to start carrying around a pad and paper, so that I can remember all the things that I want to put in my weekly stuff. Just little random notes about my week.
Nothing else Earth-shattering that I can think of for now. Hope to get a regular blog or two done this week for you.
I love you all. Thank you for enriching my life with your presence.
Friday, March 12, 2010
It's Time to Rise Above
“If ye fulfill the Royal Law according to the scripture, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself” – James 2:8
Y’all don’t expect an agnostic like me to know the Bible, do you? Well, I not only know it, but seem to do a better job of living it than most. I may not believe in what it has to say about the afterlife, but I do think it does have a few points in it that are worthy of listening to. Throw out Leviticus and a few other things, and you’re on the right track. Now, if only we could actually get the people who rail against all the liberal atrocities being committed in this country to actually live by it as well.
It is a sad story coming out of Fulton, Mississippi, where the school board has the audacity to blame Constance McMillen for cancelling the prom. She didn’t cancel it you idiots, your bigotry and intolerance cancelled it. How dare you try to put this on her. In my eyes, the only thing that this girl did wrong was that she asked for permission to bring a girl as her date. Had it been my daughter, I would have told her to just show up in her tux, with her girlfriend on her arm.
The school board said that it was cancelling the prom "due to the distractions to the educational process caused by recent events". But the only reason that there were distractions caused were because of their actions. Do you think this girl wanted anything more than to simply have the opportunity to attend her Senior prom like every other high school student does? She wasn’t looking to become a celebrity. She wasn’t looking to make national headlines. She wanted to take her girlfriend to the prom. And rather than showing a little tolerance, and some common decency, the school board cancelled the prom, and blames this teenage girl. They should be ashamed of themselves.
This really just scratches the surface of a far greater problem in this country. Why all the hatred? Why the divisiveness? Why do so many people feel as though they have this obligation to tell everyone else how to live their lives? Why are so many people unwilling to love their neighbor?
This country was founded on the principal that “all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.” So, where’s the equality? Where is the pursuit of happiness? Doesn’t apply if you’re gay? As was formerly the case if you were a woman? Or if you were black? Can you even imagine the fallout if this story out of rural Mississippi was happening because it was a black boy wanting to bring his white girlfriend to prom? Oh, wait, it’s only been about 40 or 50 years since that was the case. But somehow THIS discrimination isn’t as bad? It’s still discrimination based on fear, hatred, and an underlying lack of knowledge.
I wonder exactly what they are afraid of? That homosexuality is contagious, and that if they let these two girls into the prom, that they’ll somehow pass it on to the other kids? Pretty soon, there will be a giant epidemic of gay and lesbianism ravaging the school district? Seriously, where is the harm? Who do they think they are protecting? The kids? If this girl is openly a lesbian (which clearly she is if she’s wanting to come to prom with her girlfriend), then everyone at the school ALREADY KNOWS! It’s not going to be a shock, or a distraction. The narrow minded will snicker or laugh, as they probably do to her every day in the halls. The rest of the kids won’t care. And the next day, everyone will have a great memory of their prom.
It is so sad that in this day and age, when we are capable of so much, that we spend our time worrying about such petty and trifling things. I wish that I had never heard the name Constance McMillen. I wish that I lived in a world where you could just live your life as you saw fit, and didn’t have anyone telling you why you couldn’t.
Love is the single greatest force in the universe. It is the only thing that can overcome hatred. Like fire and water, they cancel each other out. There is too much hate in the world right now. Too much divisiveness. Too much anger. We need to embrace love wherever it is, because it makes the world a better place.
Love is losing the battle in the world, folks. Good is losing. Light is being swallowed by darkness, and that darkness is our own intolerance. We cannot continue on the path that we are on. It’s time to rise above, and that starts with acceptance. It starts with tolerance. It starts by looking within ourselves and purging whatever hatred lies there.
We’re not going to get there in time to save the girl’s prom. Hell, we might not get there in my lifetime. But I’m not going to let that stop me from trying.
Y’all don’t expect an agnostic like me to know the Bible, do you? Well, I not only know it, but seem to do a better job of living it than most. I may not believe in what it has to say about the afterlife, but I do think it does have a few points in it that are worthy of listening to. Throw out Leviticus and a few other things, and you’re on the right track. Now, if only we could actually get the people who rail against all the liberal atrocities being committed in this country to actually live by it as well.
It is a sad story coming out of Fulton, Mississippi, where the school board has the audacity to blame Constance McMillen for cancelling the prom. She didn’t cancel it you idiots, your bigotry and intolerance cancelled it. How dare you try to put this on her. In my eyes, the only thing that this girl did wrong was that she asked for permission to bring a girl as her date. Had it been my daughter, I would have told her to just show up in her tux, with her girlfriend on her arm.
The school board said that it was cancelling the prom "due to the distractions to the educational process caused by recent events". But the only reason that there were distractions caused were because of their actions. Do you think this girl wanted anything more than to simply have the opportunity to attend her Senior prom like every other high school student does? She wasn’t looking to become a celebrity. She wasn’t looking to make national headlines. She wanted to take her girlfriend to the prom. And rather than showing a little tolerance, and some common decency, the school board cancelled the prom, and blames this teenage girl. They should be ashamed of themselves.
This really just scratches the surface of a far greater problem in this country. Why all the hatred? Why the divisiveness? Why do so many people feel as though they have this obligation to tell everyone else how to live their lives? Why are so many people unwilling to love their neighbor?
This country was founded on the principal that “all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.” So, where’s the equality? Where is the pursuit of happiness? Doesn’t apply if you’re gay? As was formerly the case if you were a woman? Or if you were black? Can you even imagine the fallout if this story out of rural Mississippi was happening because it was a black boy wanting to bring his white girlfriend to prom? Oh, wait, it’s only been about 40 or 50 years since that was the case. But somehow THIS discrimination isn’t as bad? It’s still discrimination based on fear, hatred, and an underlying lack of knowledge.
I wonder exactly what they are afraid of? That homosexuality is contagious, and that if they let these two girls into the prom, that they’ll somehow pass it on to the other kids? Pretty soon, there will be a giant epidemic of gay and lesbianism ravaging the school district? Seriously, where is the harm? Who do they think they are protecting? The kids? If this girl is openly a lesbian (which clearly she is if she’s wanting to come to prom with her girlfriend), then everyone at the school ALREADY KNOWS! It’s not going to be a shock, or a distraction. The narrow minded will snicker or laugh, as they probably do to her every day in the halls. The rest of the kids won’t care. And the next day, everyone will have a great memory of their prom.
It is so sad that in this day and age, when we are capable of so much, that we spend our time worrying about such petty and trifling things. I wish that I had never heard the name Constance McMillen. I wish that I lived in a world where you could just live your life as you saw fit, and didn’t have anyone telling you why you couldn’t.
Love is the single greatest force in the universe. It is the only thing that can overcome hatred. Like fire and water, they cancel each other out. There is too much hate in the world right now. Too much divisiveness. Too much anger. We need to embrace love wherever it is, because it makes the world a better place.
Love is losing the battle in the world, folks. Good is losing. Light is being swallowed by darkness, and that darkness is our own intolerance. We cannot continue on the path that we are on. It’s time to rise above, and that starts with acceptance. It starts with tolerance. It starts by looking within ourselves and purging whatever hatred lies there.
We’re not going to get there in time to save the girl’s prom. Hell, we might not get there in my lifetime. But I’m not going to let that stop me from trying.
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Through the Weekly Looking Glass
So, a day late on the weekly roundup, but yesterday was a full day, so I can't complain. I guess, technically, I'm two days late, but calendar days really aren't something that matters all that much with my current schedule. I mean, what do you do when your schedule is really more of a noon to 4am schedule? I feel like I should have an alternate calendar, where the days roll over at 6am or something. Right now, it's 3am on a Tuesday, but it just feels like Monday night to me. I think we should be able to adjust the calendar to our own needs.
Saw Alice in Wonderland on the IMAX up in Portland. Was fabulous, and I highly recommend it. Not Avatar fabulous, but still worth seeing in the theater, and definitely in 3D. Johnny Depp was amazing as always, and the CGI stuff was awesome. It was also nice to see Crispin Glover actually getting some work. He's such a great actor, but so damn weird that he never gets any work.
Of course, the absolute highlight of the whole experience was seeing the new Tron: Legacy trailer in 3D. I had seen the teaser trailer, with the big lightcycle chase, which has been available online for almost a year. But to see the actual 2+ minute trailer on an IMAX screen in 3D... just... WOW! That's going to be fucking incredible. Just bummed that I have to wait until December for it.
I do, of course, realize that I'm just a massive fan-boy when it comes to Tron. I'm willing to bet good money, though, that I can still kick any of your asses on the video game, assuming you could actually find an arcade that has one. I wonder if there will be a renewal of interest in it with the movie coming out. Hmmm.
Also managed to squeeze in a trip to Powell's books. I still enjoy being there, but it doesn't hold nearly as much allure as it used to. The prices just aren't all that great anymore. I have a hard time justifying most of my purchases. I doubt Michael Powell is stressing over it, but I don't spend anywhere near what I used to when the books were actually cheap. When I was in college, a book that had a $25 price tag when it was new was like $12-$13 used. Now, they're $18-$19. Where's my incentive? I can buy them brand new at Borders for the same price or less. Of course, what I really miss is when I had Dave's sister's employee discount, so that I could get half off all the used prices. When you can get a first edition hardcover for $6, you tend to stock up. It's why I have an entire bedroom full of first editions. I don't think I ever walked out of there without at least two full bags of books. Now, I usually buy half a dozen or so, but even then I sometimes balk at the prices. I don't think I ever had a trip there, until about three years ago, when I would actually leave without buying something. Now, I'd say that I do that about half the time, and the rest of the time I only buy a handful. Such a shame.
Baseball is going well for those of you following my coaching exploits. Very time consuming, and about to get VERY time consuming, as soon as games start and I begin scouting on all the off days. But that's just about my favorite part. I think we'll have enough pitching, although I'll be dealing with more walks than usual. My biggest fear is that I don't have an overpowering pitching staff, but rather one that will put the ball in play and rely on it's defense to make plays. Unfortunately, defense looks to be the biggest weakness of this team. We'll see how it plays out, and I'll keep you all informed.
For a week that I didn't seem to get anything done, I sure didn't have a whole lot of time. Was an odd week that way. But I did manage to get caught up on my TV shows that I had taped or Hulued, and to start digging out from the hole that is my email.
Cashed for the 6th straight week at "The Rob", which is a record. Will try for 7 tomorrow night (or tonight for those of you who are calendar-strict). Wish me luck.
Watched Big Night again on DVD this week. Made me want to cook more. Made my spicy BBQ meatballs the other night, and plan on doing a little more cooking on my rare nights off in the coming weeks.
Okay, I have little else to say.
Stay happy and healthy my friends. I love you all.
Saw Alice in Wonderland on the IMAX up in Portland. Was fabulous, and I highly recommend it. Not Avatar fabulous, but still worth seeing in the theater, and definitely in 3D. Johnny Depp was amazing as always, and the CGI stuff was awesome. It was also nice to see Crispin Glover actually getting some work. He's such a great actor, but so damn weird that he never gets any work.
Of course, the absolute highlight of the whole experience was seeing the new Tron: Legacy trailer in 3D. I had seen the teaser trailer, with the big lightcycle chase, which has been available online for almost a year. But to see the actual 2+ minute trailer on an IMAX screen in 3D... just... WOW! That's going to be fucking incredible. Just bummed that I have to wait until December for it.
I do, of course, realize that I'm just a massive fan-boy when it comes to Tron. I'm willing to bet good money, though, that I can still kick any of your asses on the video game, assuming you could actually find an arcade that has one. I wonder if there will be a renewal of interest in it with the movie coming out. Hmmm.
Also managed to squeeze in a trip to Powell's books. I still enjoy being there, but it doesn't hold nearly as much allure as it used to. The prices just aren't all that great anymore. I have a hard time justifying most of my purchases. I doubt Michael Powell is stressing over it, but I don't spend anywhere near what I used to when the books were actually cheap. When I was in college, a book that had a $25 price tag when it was new was like $12-$13 used. Now, they're $18-$19. Where's my incentive? I can buy them brand new at Borders for the same price or less. Of course, what I really miss is when I had Dave's sister's employee discount, so that I could get half off all the used prices. When you can get a first edition hardcover for $6, you tend to stock up. It's why I have an entire bedroom full of first editions. I don't think I ever walked out of there without at least two full bags of books. Now, I usually buy half a dozen or so, but even then I sometimes balk at the prices. I don't think I ever had a trip there, until about three years ago, when I would actually leave without buying something. Now, I'd say that I do that about half the time, and the rest of the time I only buy a handful. Such a shame.
Baseball is going well for those of you following my coaching exploits. Very time consuming, and about to get VERY time consuming, as soon as games start and I begin scouting on all the off days. But that's just about my favorite part. I think we'll have enough pitching, although I'll be dealing with more walks than usual. My biggest fear is that I don't have an overpowering pitching staff, but rather one that will put the ball in play and rely on it's defense to make plays. Unfortunately, defense looks to be the biggest weakness of this team. We'll see how it plays out, and I'll keep you all informed.
For a week that I didn't seem to get anything done, I sure didn't have a whole lot of time. Was an odd week that way. But I did manage to get caught up on my TV shows that I had taped or Hulued, and to start digging out from the hole that is my email.
Cashed for the 6th straight week at "The Rob", which is a record. Will try for 7 tomorrow night (or tonight for those of you who are calendar-strict). Wish me luck.
Watched Big Night again on DVD this week. Made me want to cook more. Made my spicy BBQ meatballs the other night, and plan on doing a little more cooking on my rare nights off in the coming weeks.
Okay, I have little else to say.
Stay happy and healthy my friends. I love you all.
Saturday, March 6, 2010
The Unbreakable Spirit
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure."--Marianne Williamson (not Nelson Mandela as the web would have you believe)
I was on a bit of a political train of thought this week. Partially from my last post, partially from watching Bill Maher last night, partially from just some random collection of thoughts that led me down that path. I'll only stay on it for a moment, simply to allow you to follow me on the journey that my own thoughts took. Bill Maher had one of my lifelong crushes on this week, Arianna Huffington. She made a great point about Republicans, and I will (just to show that I'm not completely biased) give a rebuttal about Democrats. (Trust me, stick with me, this really is going to be a positive blog). Huffington's assertion was that Republicans have gone so far off course that they don't believe in anything anymore. Their entire policy isn't defined by what they want, but rather, what they don't want the Democrats to do. If Obama says "X, Y and Z are great, we should pursue them", then rather than saying, "No, A, B, and C are great, we should pursue them instead", all the Republicans know how to do anymore is say, "X, Y and Z are terrible, and anyone who thinks they're great is an idiot." There is no creation anymore, only destruction.
The problem is that Democrats have jumped the track as well. I'm a Democrat because I care about society as a whole, and don't have a whole lot of sympathy for the Gordon Gecko "Greed is Good" mantra. I'm a borderline socialist, and don't think that's a bad thing. The problem as I see it in the Democratic party is that, in politics, you cannot be all things to all people. Obama's problem isn't that he has the wrong ideas, it's that he's trying to take the most disparate ideologies, and hopes to find common ground. It would have worked great if this was 1920, or 1940. Unfortunately, in today's political climate, that just doesn't work. You can't make everyone happy, and eventually you have to stand up and find your own voice, and be the leader that you are supposed to be.
This train of thought led me on to other things, most specifically, relationships. I have many friends who had a rough year when it came to relationships. Obviously, I didn't have the greatest one myself. I am just as guilty of the following sins as anyone, and hopefully will learn from them moving forward. The biggest one committed was losing our own hopes and dreams to the needs of our partners. It is natural, and even noble, to want to make your partner happy. I go above and beyond, and don't see anything wrong with that. I think it is how everyone should be, and how everyone should approach the person that they love. If you're not willing to go the extra mile, why are you with them?
The problem is that many of us have a very hard time striking the right balance. Either we don't do enough for our partner, or we lose ourselves in the bargain. Time and again, I see friends who are making excuses about why they are the ones making the sacrifice, over and over and over again. Eventually, you begin to lose sight of who you really are. Your dreams, your wants, your desires, are all cast aside in the name of making the people in your life happy.
Some people do this because it is easier. Standing up for yourself is hard. Defining your role in a relationship is hard. Making sure you're not a doormat, while also doing your best to not walk all over your partner sometimes seems like it is impossible. So laying down seems easier. Just give in this one time, and worry about the bigger things. Then, when the bigger things come along, it's easier to just give in this time, and wait for the REALLY big things. The problem is that once those REALLY big things come along, the pattern has already been put into place. The wall is now too big to scale, and you're stuck giving in yet again. So is it really easier in the long run?
We can have it all. Maybe not in politics, but definitely in life, love, and relationships. The only thing keeping us down is ourselves. We all deserve more, we all deserve the entire package. We just have to be willing to take it. We have to own ourselves, know ourselves, and stand up for ourselves. It really isn't that hard. Respect yourself, and no one will ever be able to take that away from you. Respect others, and they will begin to find it within themselves.
I have said before that I truly believe that love is the most powerful force in the universe. Not just romantic love, which is wonderful but limited in scope. No, love for yourself. Love for your common man. Love for the people that you choose to share your life with. You get what you give.
We have the power to make not only our lives, but the lives of everyone around us better. We can embrace that path, or we can cower from it. Is your fear that you will fail? Or is your fear that you will succeed? Love yourself. Respect yourself. Own yourself. Once you've learned how to do those things, you will no longer be downtrodden, no matter your lot in life. You will be the unbreakable spirit, and the world will be a better place for having you in it.
I was on a bit of a political train of thought this week. Partially from my last post, partially from watching Bill Maher last night, partially from just some random collection of thoughts that led me down that path. I'll only stay on it for a moment, simply to allow you to follow me on the journey that my own thoughts took. Bill Maher had one of my lifelong crushes on this week, Arianna Huffington. She made a great point about Republicans, and I will (just to show that I'm not completely biased) give a rebuttal about Democrats. (Trust me, stick with me, this really is going to be a positive blog). Huffington's assertion was that Republicans have gone so far off course that they don't believe in anything anymore. Their entire policy isn't defined by what they want, but rather, what they don't want the Democrats to do. If Obama says "X, Y and Z are great, we should pursue them", then rather than saying, "No, A, B, and C are great, we should pursue them instead", all the Republicans know how to do anymore is say, "X, Y and Z are terrible, and anyone who thinks they're great is an idiot." There is no creation anymore, only destruction.
The problem is that Democrats have jumped the track as well. I'm a Democrat because I care about society as a whole, and don't have a whole lot of sympathy for the Gordon Gecko "Greed is Good" mantra. I'm a borderline socialist, and don't think that's a bad thing. The problem as I see it in the Democratic party is that, in politics, you cannot be all things to all people. Obama's problem isn't that he has the wrong ideas, it's that he's trying to take the most disparate ideologies, and hopes to find common ground. It would have worked great if this was 1920, or 1940. Unfortunately, in today's political climate, that just doesn't work. You can't make everyone happy, and eventually you have to stand up and find your own voice, and be the leader that you are supposed to be.
This train of thought led me on to other things, most specifically, relationships. I have many friends who had a rough year when it came to relationships. Obviously, I didn't have the greatest one myself. I am just as guilty of the following sins as anyone, and hopefully will learn from them moving forward. The biggest one committed was losing our own hopes and dreams to the needs of our partners. It is natural, and even noble, to want to make your partner happy. I go above and beyond, and don't see anything wrong with that. I think it is how everyone should be, and how everyone should approach the person that they love. If you're not willing to go the extra mile, why are you with them?
The problem is that many of us have a very hard time striking the right balance. Either we don't do enough for our partner, or we lose ourselves in the bargain. Time and again, I see friends who are making excuses about why they are the ones making the sacrifice, over and over and over again. Eventually, you begin to lose sight of who you really are. Your dreams, your wants, your desires, are all cast aside in the name of making the people in your life happy.
Some people do this because it is easier. Standing up for yourself is hard. Defining your role in a relationship is hard. Making sure you're not a doormat, while also doing your best to not walk all over your partner sometimes seems like it is impossible. So laying down seems easier. Just give in this one time, and worry about the bigger things. Then, when the bigger things come along, it's easier to just give in this time, and wait for the REALLY big things. The problem is that once those REALLY big things come along, the pattern has already been put into place. The wall is now too big to scale, and you're stuck giving in yet again. So is it really easier in the long run?
We can have it all. Maybe not in politics, but definitely in life, love, and relationships. The only thing keeping us down is ourselves. We all deserve more, we all deserve the entire package. We just have to be willing to take it. We have to own ourselves, know ourselves, and stand up for ourselves. It really isn't that hard. Respect yourself, and no one will ever be able to take that away from you. Respect others, and they will begin to find it within themselves.
I have said before that I truly believe that love is the most powerful force in the universe. Not just romantic love, which is wonderful but limited in scope. No, love for yourself. Love for your common man. Love for the people that you choose to share your life with. You get what you give.
We have the power to make not only our lives, but the lives of everyone around us better. We can embrace that path, or we can cower from it. Is your fear that you will fail? Or is your fear that you will succeed? Love yourself. Respect yourself. Own yourself. Once you've learned how to do those things, you will no longer be downtrodden, no matter your lot in life. You will be the unbreakable spirit, and the world will be a better place for having you in it.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Making the Right Choice
As many of you know, I’m a pretty liberal guy when it comes to politics. I strongly support gay marriage and gay adoption. I am not a gun owner, and am generally for tougher laws on guns. I think we should legalize not only marijuana, but almost all drugs, and use some of the money that taxing and regulating would generate to fund treatment and recovery programs. I’m also very much Pro Choice, which is a topic that I wanted to touch on in today’s blog.
I was getting the oil changed in my car the other day, and the kind people at Oil Can Henry’s always provide you with a free newspaper. So, as I flip open to page 2, there’s a story there with the headline “Abortion foes make racial case to gain black support”. I was intrigued, so I read the story. Wow. It seems that a group in Atlanta, Georgia Right To Life, had hired a black woman to be its new “minority outreach coordinator”. This woman started traveling around the state, talking about how abortion is the latest tool being used by whites to kill off blacks, and keep their numbers in check. Seriously.
I have so many problems with this story, that I truly don’t even know where to start. I suppose I should just dive right in, so if this seems a little jumbled, I do apologize.
First of all, I don’t know of anyone who is Pro Choice that would label themselves as Pro Abortion. It isn’t something that we go around celebrating when it happens. I’ve been there, I’ve had to make that choice, and it was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. Anyone who tells you differently is lying to you. So the idea that white society is somehow marketing abortions to black society, all in an effort to keep the population in check is ludicrous. I don’t really want this blog to become a rant specifically about whether or not Pro Choice is how things should be. If you don’t support it, I truly do understand your position. I am very glad that the Supreme Court doesn’t share your viewpoint, but I won’t tell you that you’re wrong. You should believe what you want to believe in, and make your own choices accordingly.
To suggest, however, that blacks are being targeted because of their race is just terrible. The article, and the basis of GRL’s claims, is that black women have a higher percentage of abortions relative to the number of pregnancies than white or Hispanic women do. This isn’t a racial thing, it’s a cultural thing. First of all, let’s discount the Hispanic numbers right off the bat. As a general rule, Hispanics are both more religious and, specifically more Catholic than the average in this country. As such, abortion is viewed as a sin to a large portion of that culture. Of course the numbers will be smaller.
So, lets make it strictly, for the sake of this blog, a Black vs. White argument. Why in the world would black women have more abortions than white women? Hmm. Yup, the first thing I jump to is race. Trying to kill off the blacks, that’s what it MUST be about. Couldn’t possibly be because of the fact that white women are generally more affluent than black women. That they have better education on average couldn’t possibly play a role. And certainly, there’s no way that actually having better access to birth control could have any factor in the numbers at all. Nope, it’s all a plot by The Man to kill off as many black babies as possible. Gotta be. No argument with that logic.
For those of you who aren’t adept at reading sarcasm on the written page, allow me to translate into normal speak.
Black women are on average less educated, less able to take care of a baby financially, have less access to birth control due to less adequate health care coverage, and together, those factors make a HUGE difference in the number of unwanted pregnancies. Furthermore, there aren’t as many people willing to adopt a black child as there are wanting to adopt a white one. So the black woman, who doesn’t have as much health care coverage on average, also doesn’t have as many options to have someone cover her medical costs in exchange for having the baby and giving it up for adoption to that person or couple.
It disgusts me that this group is trying to turn this into a racial thing, when clearly it isn’t. Furthermore, their interest is done as soon as that child is born. Is Georgia Right To Life also supporting increased social programs to help out that black woman once she actually has the baby that they are trying to save? Do they support inner-city education programs? Drug rehabilitation and education programs for minorities? Programs to help single black mothers increase their lot in life in any way shape or form? Welfare? Head Start? Anything? Are they doing outreach to encourage more white couples to adopt black children? No, of course not. Once you have the baby, you’re on your own, sister.
Listen, if you are against Pro Choice, against Roe v. Wade, against the Supreme Court, and you truly believe that all abortions are a sin, that is your right. But don’t piss on my leg and tell me it’s raining either. This isn’t a racial thing, and abortion is not a plan by Whitey to stamp out the number of black babies. If you truly want to help limit the number of abortions, then support increased funding for education, and social equality programs in poorer neighborhoods. Support Universal Health Care so that everyone who needs it can have easy access to birth control. Support Planned Parenthood, who is NOT a Pro-Abortion entity. “Planned” … “Parenthood”. Their goal isn’t to increase the number of abortions. It is to allow people access to the information that they need to make the right decisions when it comes to their reproductive health. They supply birth control, they supply condoms, they educate. Education is a good thing, folks.
I would love it, and I think every Pro Choice person out there would love it if there wasn’t another abortion ever on this planet. Not because it was illegal, but because they weren’t necessary. That everyone on the planet had the ability to have access to the things they needed to eliminate unwanted pregnancies. That everyone who got pregnant was in a financial position to love and support that child in a caring and loving family environment. That there was no rape, no sexual assault, no molestation, nothing that would ever lead anyone to be in a position that they needed to make that choice. That would be great. But until that fantasyland appears, I’m glad we have the choices that we do.
I was getting the oil changed in my car the other day, and the kind people at Oil Can Henry’s always provide you with a free newspaper. So, as I flip open to page 2, there’s a story there with the headline “Abortion foes make racial case to gain black support”. I was intrigued, so I read the story. Wow. It seems that a group in Atlanta, Georgia Right To Life, had hired a black woman to be its new “minority outreach coordinator”. This woman started traveling around the state, talking about how abortion is the latest tool being used by whites to kill off blacks, and keep their numbers in check. Seriously.
I have so many problems with this story, that I truly don’t even know where to start. I suppose I should just dive right in, so if this seems a little jumbled, I do apologize.
First of all, I don’t know of anyone who is Pro Choice that would label themselves as Pro Abortion. It isn’t something that we go around celebrating when it happens. I’ve been there, I’ve had to make that choice, and it was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. Anyone who tells you differently is lying to you. So the idea that white society is somehow marketing abortions to black society, all in an effort to keep the population in check is ludicrous. I don’t really want this blog to become a rant specifically about whether or not Pro Choice is how things should be. If you don’t support it, I truly do understand your position. I am very glad that the Supreme Court doesn’t share your viewpoint, but I won’t tell you that you’re wrong. You should believe what you want to believe in, and make your own choices accordingly.
To suggest, however, that blacks are being targeted because of their race is just terrible. The article, and the basis of GRL’s claims, is that black women have a higher percentage of abortions relative to the number of pregnancies than white or Hispanic women do. This isn’t a racial thing, it’s a cultural thing. First of all, let’s discount the Hispanic numbers right off the bat. As a general rule, Hispanics are both more religious and, specifically more Catholic than the average in this country. As such, abortion is viewed as a sin to a large portion of that culture. Of course the numbers will be smaller.
So, lets make it strictly, for the sake of this blog, a Black vs. White argument. Why in the world would black women have more abortions than white women? Hmm. Yup, the first thing I jump to is race. Trying to kill off the blacks, that’s what it MUST be about. Couldn’t possibly be because of the fact that white women are generally more affluent than black women. That they have better education on average couldn’t possibly play a role. And certainly, there’s no way that actually having better access to birth control could have any factor in the numbers at all. Nope, it’s all a plot by The Man to kill off as many black babies as possible. Gotta be. No argument with that logic.
For those of you who aren’t adept at reading sarcasm on the written page, allow me to translate into normal speak.
Black women are on average less educated, less able to take care of a baby financially, have less access to birth control due to less adequate health care coverage, and together, those factors make a HUGE difference in the number of unwanted pregnancies. Furthermore, there aren’t as many people willing to adopt a black child as there are wanting to adopt a white one. So the black woman, who doesn’t have as much health care coverage on average, also doesn’t have as many options to have someone cover her medical costs in exchange for having the baby and giving it up for adoption to that person or couple.
It disgusts me that this group is trying to turn this into a racial thing, when clearly it isn’t. Furthermore, their interest is done as soon as that child is born. Is Georgia Right To Life also supporting increased social programs to help out that black woman once she actually has the baby that they are trying to save? Do they support inner-city education programs? Drug rehabilitation and education programs for minorities? Programs to help single black mothers increase their lot in life in any way shape or form? Welfare? Head Start? Anything? Are they doing outreach to encourage more white couples to adopt black children? No, of course not. Once you have the baby, you’re on your own, sister.
Listen, if you are against Pro Choice, against Roe v. Wade, against the Supreme Court, and you truly believe that all abortions are a sin, that is your right. But don’t piss on my leg and tell me it’s raining either. This isn’t a racial thing, and abortion is not a plan by Whitey to stamp out the number of black babies. If you truly want to help limit the number of abortions, then support increased funding for education, and social equality programs in poorer neighborhoods. Support Universal Health Care so that everyone who needs it can have easy access to birth control. Support Planned Parenthood, who is NOT a Pro-Abortion entity. “Planned” … “Parenthood”. Their goal isn’t to increase the number of abortions. It is to allow people access to the information that they need to make the right decisions when it comes to their reproductive health. They supply birth control, they supply condoms, they educate. Education is a good thing, folks.
I would love it, and I think every Pro Choice person out there would love it if there wasn’t another abortion ever on this planet. Not because it was illegal, but because they weren’t necessary. That everyone on the planet had the ability to have access to the things they needed to eliminate unwanted pregnancies. That everyone who got pregnant was in a financial position to love and support that child in a caring and loving family environment. That there was no rape, no sexual assault, no molestation, nothing that would ever lead anyone to be in a position that they needed to make that choice. That would be great. But until that fantasyland appears, I’m glad we have the choices that we do.
Monday, March 1, 2010
No, really, I'm still alive...
Okay, my bad. Missed last weeks short takes blog, and then went the whole week without posting. Smack my hand with a ruler. Well, if you look like the really hot Church of Sk8in mascot/nun you can do it. ;) I do apologize, and promise a number of new blogs this week. So, without further ado, the weekly short takes...
Wow, I've been busy. Baseball starting back up; helping to run the Fetish Ball; AIPCO; organizing the WSOP satellite, and the sub-satellites; trying to squeeze in a social life of some kind; it's been hectic. But I do feel as though I'm at least starting to get on top of it again.
Baseball has been good so far. AAA is supposed to be primarily 10 year olds, with a few 11's and the occasional true STUD 9 year old. Well, that isn't really how things worked out for us. We've got like 7 10's, 4 9's, an 8 and a 7 year old. We're going to struggle a bit. On the bright side, I did find a couple of pitchers this week. So, as it stands right now, I'll actually have a 6 man staff, which is what I need to survive. Now, getting them all to throw strikes, that might be another problem, but one day (and problem) at a time.
The Fetish Ball was a mixed bag. Good crowd. Loved working with Gwen for the first time. We have a very good connection, and seem to be on the same page with pretty much everything. The downside is that we ended up spending as much time barbacking as we did running the fetish side of things. Neither one of us will last long if that becomes part of the regular expectation. Joey is a good bartender, and works his ass off. But he desperately needs an actual barback, and doesn't need to be grasping at whoever happens to be around to help him out. Not what I signed up for, and not what I'll do in the future. But, other than that, it was a pretty good night. I think that we have an opportunity to expand it and make it a much better event on a regular basis. But there are plenty of things to do. We'll see how it all plays out.
Bubbled at AIPCO. Fucking hate that. Would rather go out at 9pm than play all night and miss it by one spot. Super frustrating. However, I am on a 5-week cashing streak at "The Rob" and am doing quite well online for the first two months of the year. So I can't complain too much. But it would be nice to get a big cash at AIPCO out of the way early, so that I don't have to dwell on points, standings, etc. for the second half of the year. Haven't been able to lock up my spot in the Top-30 in the first half of the year since 2006. Hopefully will turn it around next month. I really am playing great poker right now. Just seeing it all.
Looks like I'm on the path to get the TSA job out at the airport. Thought for sure I had bombed the test, but they gave me the conditional offer of employment. I'll keep looking at other stuff too, as that process will likely take at least a month to get everything lined up with TSA. Just nice to know that I'll have something lined up when I'm ready.
Made Napoleons for the first time this week. Cooking with the beautiful and amazingly pleasant Val, with Unna as our taster/overseer. They were considerably easier to make than I had thought in the past. Did four flavors, vanilla, chocolate, and then vanilla-orange, and chocolate-orange. The orange ones were amazing. Looking forward to branching out and doing a bunch more flavors in the future. Will have to hit Randy up for some more of his strawberry jam, which would go really well in them.
Olympics are over now. Lost interest about halfway through for the most part. The whole NBC showing stuff on massive delay just doesn't work for me. I know I can go to ESPN.com, and find out who wins everything 6 hours before it is on TV. If it's someone that I like, or a U.S. person wins gold, I might watch. But we only won 9 golds, so there wasn't a whole lot of that. Was bummed that hockey lost in the final match, but Canada really should have won. They had the best team, and it is their national sport, so I'm happy for them. But Ryan Miller is just a stud in goal for us. And at least if we were going to lose, it was Sidney Crosby who scored the goal. Okay, now back to my regular TV schedule...
What's with the earthquakes? You know, it'll be interesting to see what the reaction is like for Chile. It's like when your friends have their first kid, and they take like, 10,000 photos. Then the second kid comes along the next year, and it's about one-tenth of that. I get the feeling that will be the outpouring of support for Chile. Yeah, you know, we feel bad for you, but we already gave money for Haiti. Sorry bro'. Just the bad luck of coming a couple of weeks late. And did anyone else completely miss that Japan got hit by a 7.0 earthquake like two days before the Chile quake? I mean, that's three major earthquakes in only a few weeks time. The planet is not happy.
Saw a tremendously scary story online the other day. The FDIC was billions in the red last year. And they are projecting losses of up to $50 billion over the next few years. I mean, holy crap. So you're telling me that not only might my bank go under (oh wait, I banked with WAMU, it already did), but that the government agency that insures my bank might go under? How great is that? I realize that they would never let the FDIC actually fail, but still, it gives you pause, doesn't it? The most telling statistic from the story: Number of bank failures by year: 2007-3; 2008-25; 2009-140. Wow. That's just freaky bad. The story said that the FDIC expects failures to continue at that pace for the next three years. And we're coming out of the recession.... Riiiiiiiiiight.
So funny. As I sit here typing, both cats are right behind me, sleeping in exactly the same pose. Tried to get a picture, but couldn't angle the webcam just right.
Watched the Stones documentary/concert film, Shine a Light this week. Was a little weird. I've seen the Stones three times live, so the concert part of the film didn't hold nearly the allure for me that it might for some. I really wanted more of the documentary side of the film. The first 15-20 minutes are just this jumbled, back and forth, hectic thing, with Scorsese in it. But that was actually the part that I loved. Would have enjoyed more of Scorsese behind the scenes, showing how it was coming together. But the actual concert footage was beautiful to look at.
Okay, I can think of nothing else to ramble on about. So I will wrap this up with a promise to blog at least a couple of times this week.
Love you all.
Wow, I've been busy. Baseball starting back up; helping to run the Fetish Ball; AIPCO; organizing the WSOP satellite, and the sub-satellites; trying to squeeze in a social life of some kind; it's been hectic. But I do feel as though I'm at least starting to get on top of it again.
Baseball has been good so far. AAA is supposed to be primarily 10 year olds, with a few 11's and the occasional true STUD 9 year old. Well, that isn't really how things worked out for us. We've got like 7 10's, 4 9's, an 8 and a 7 year old. We're going to struggle a bit. On the bright side, I did find a couple of pitchers this week. So, as it stands right now, I'll actually have a 6 man staff, which is what I need to survive. Now, getting them all to throw strikes, that might be another problem, but one day (and problem) at a time.
The Fetish Ball was a mixed bag. Good crowd. Loved working with Gwen for the first time. We have a very good connection, and seem to be on the same page with pretty much everything. The downside is that we ended up spending as much time barbacking as we did running the fetish side of things. Neither one of us will last long if that becomes part of the regular expectation. Joey is a good bartender, and works his ass off. But he desperately needs an actual barback, and doesn't need to be grasping at whoever happens to be around to help him out. Not what I signed up for, and not what I'll do in the future. But, other than that, it was a pretty good night. I think that we have an opportunity to expand it and make it a much better event on a regular basis. But there are plenty of things to do. We'll see how it all plays out.
Bubbled at AIPCO. Fucking hate that. Would rather go out at 9pm than play all night and miss it by one spot. Super frustrating. However, I am on a 5-week cashing streak at "The Rob" and am doing quite well online for the first two months of the year. So I can't complain too much. But it would be nice to get a big cash at AIPCO out of the way early, so that I don't have to dwell on points, standings, etc. for the second half of the year. Haven't been able to lock up my spot in the Top-30 in the first half of the year since 2006. Hopefully will turn it around next month. I really am playing great poker right now. Just seeing it all.
Looks like I'm on the path to get the TSA job out at the airport. Thought for sure I had bombed the test, but they gave me the conditional offer of employment. I'll keep looking at other stuff too, as that process will likely take at least a month to get everything lined up with TSA. Just nice to know that I'll have something lined up when I'm ready.
Made Napoleons for the first time this week. Cooking with the beautiful and amazingly pleasant Val, with Unna as our taster/overseer. They were considerably easier to make than I had thought in the past. Did four flavors, vanilla, chocolate, and then vanilla-orange, and chocolate-orange. The orange ones were amazing. Looking forward to branching out and doing a bunch more flavors in the future. Will have to hit Randy up for some more of his strawberry jam, which would go really well in them.
Olympics are over now. Lost interest about halfway through for the most part. The whole NBC showing stuff on massive delay just doesn't work for me. I know I can go to ESPN.com, and find out who wins everything 6 hours before it is on TV. If it's someone that I like, or a U.S. person wins gold, I might watch. But we only won 9 golds, so there wasn't a whole lot of that. Was bummed that hockey lost in the final match, but Canada really should have won. They had the best team, and it is their national sport, so I'm happy for them. But Ryan Miller is just a stud in goal for us. And at least if we were going to lose, it was Sidney Crosby who scored the goal. Okay, now back to my regular TV schedule...
What's with the earthquakes? You know, it'll be interesting to see what the reaction is like for Chile. It's like when your friends have their first kid, and they take like, 10,000 photos. Then the second kid comes along the next year, and it's about one-tenth of that. I get the feeling that will be the outpouring of support for Chile. Yeah, you know, we feel bad for you, but we already gave money for Haiti. Sorry bro'. Just the bad luck of coming a couple of weeks late. And did anyone else completely miss that Japan got hit by a 7.0 earthquake like two days before the Chile quake? I mean, that's three major earthquakes in only a few weeks time. The planet is not happy.
Saw a tremendously scary story online the other day. The FDIC was billions in the red last year. And they are projecting losses of up to $50 billion over the next few years. I mean, holy crap. So you're telling me that not only might my bank go under (oh wait, I banked with WAMU, it already did), but that the government agency that insures my bank might go under? How great is that? I realize that they would never let the FDIC actually fail, but still, it gives you pause, doesn't it? The most telling statistic from the story: Number of bank failures by year: 2007-3; 2008-25; 2009-140. Wow. That's just freaky bad. The story said that the FDIC expects failures to continue at that pace for the next three years. And we're coming out of the recession.... Riiiiiiiiiight.
So funny. As I sit here typing, both cats are right behind me, sleeping in exactly the same pose. Tried to get a picture, but couldn't angle the webcam just right.
Watched the Stones documentary/concert film, Shine a Light this week. Was a little weird. I've seen the Stones three times live, so the concert part of the film didn't hold nearly the allure for me that it might for some. I really wanted more of the documentary side of the film. The first 15-20 minutes are just this jumbled, back and forth, hectic thing, with Scorsese in it. But that was actually the part that I loved. Would have enjoyed more of Scorsese behind the scenes, showing how it was coming together. But the actual concert footage was beautiful to look at.
Okay, I can think of nothing else to ramble on about. So I will wrap this up with a promise to blog at least a couple of times this week.
Love you all.
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